Jan 24, 2013

Spiritual Encounters

Summary: Pressed reconciliation of mother issues; male counterpart of our trio team in training is chosen for assignment over us; indulgent fun instead; encounter with human spirits being transported from Earth and two alien crafts; third craft drops metal cage device in my hands for me to hold onto; differentiating what is spiritually permisable and what is harmful (good and evil).

I have my most profound dreams when I have been letting light into my soul with acceptance of myself, love, compassion, allowance of joy, and effort toward changing my life toward those goals. I also have an easier time recalling my dreams when I feel in the higher levels of my consciousness, not dragging on the ground with fear, stagnation, anxiety, annoyance, untended anger. Sometimes however, at my most fragile, is when my dreams are the most uplifting, providing an image of my ideal self. Right now, though, I am confused and fearful that there are other forces besides just my friendly galactic neighbors who are communicating with me. Distinguishing the meanings of my dreams recently has been tough, probably because they are pointing out areas of myself that need maintenance.

Night of Jan. 23rd/24th 2013

Dream: Multiple sequences. Reported Out of Order.
Dropped off at my parents house. Fight with my mother who refuses to hear what I have to say. Angrily, I declared my limit had been reached by leaving the house to stand on the porch contemplating my desire to just get away from here. Snow is falling endlessly outside blanketing everything in white. Jim wouldn't be able to get me for days and I didn't have a vehicle here. I could walk home alone. The snow has accumulated to never before seen heights, though. I can't walk in this. The snow built up two feet in a matter of minutes (like the San Francisco dream) when I was considering just walking home; it was forcing me to stay here and deal. My mother walks out and tries to hand me a bit of cash. "What is this about?" She was conceding, and wanted to at least give me some money if I was to stray out on my own. The feeling of the dream was that she wasn't going to bother to fight for me to stay, that if I wanted to run away, maybe it was better that way. I exploded again. "You're just going to push me away? Here take some money and go. This clears your conscience?" She stood out there with me for a moment. Issues I've had with her all my life are coming up. She interrupted me with some other topic, half speaking to me and half to herself. "This is what I mean, you don't listen when I come to you. You get distracted and veer off on your own issues." We were getting no where, but it felt important that these were all coming out so fast in sequence. Two others my age are sitting next to me on the porch, a male and female [the two I survived the three days on a lake with?]. A black, short limo crashes through our fence to halt in front of us. They call for the male. Two men in black are sitting in the front seats. He is being recruited. This is when I am even aware of the presence of the male and female. The female friend behind me begs "Take me too! Can I come as well?" I begrudgingly say "I hate you" over and over toward the guy chosen. He gets in and they back out to leave without us. They made their one and only choice. We didn't make the cut.

With two girlfriends, planning on enjoying ourselves and being spontaneous and fun. Let's buy an outfit for each other to experiment with styles. I dress Chelsea up as a horse rider. Are we attacked? I paint one of their nails. Person who runs the makeup stuff in a backstage dressing room kind of setup slash (/) makeover counter at a mall store is trying politely to tell us to leave the makeup to her. I'm just doing nail polish, we're not making a mess. Oh this isn't the right color for the other girl, it won't compliment her skin tone. Grab another color to paint other friend's nails.

Enjoying intimate time with a petite girl with long sandy hair. I pick her up with my hands wrapped around her buttocks. She is light. Her legs wrap around me. I drop her down on the bed leaning into her pelvis. She is excited for me. I grab the dildo of my strap on laying beside us and tickle her vagina. "Is that what you want?" I can't wait to thrust it into her and hear her moan. I want to show her how much fun she can have when a woman is offering the pleasure of a large, erect dildo.

Night, in a house. I notice UFO in the sky slowly flying down toward us outside. It had a circle of lights at the base of the dome, and a few more of the yellow-white lights on the underside. I was led to the roof where a group of humans of all different types were standing there. I waved at them. They waved at me and were cheerful. I asked them what they were doing, they said they were going aboard the ship, "They are taking us away!" "Are you dead?" I asked them. They thought I was sweet. They were turning away from me to board the ship again, deciding not to answer me. They were somewhere between corporeal and noncorporeal, solid but transparent. They were visible but had no substance on the physical world.

Another ship swooped down close to them. I tried to see windows, and figures in the windows, feeling more nervous about this ship. I saw the figures and waved hesitantly to them. They waved back. I felt better knowing they seemed friendly, that they weren't abducting these souls. I ran back in the house. "You'll never believe what I saw!" Another saucer in the sky I noticed out one of the windows. "Look, there! Another one." I told my father who got to a window before I did. It came down incredibly close. A little device came into the room, which fell out of the air into my hands. It looked like a series of bent steel wires, hollow, cage-like, but told me it was a transceiver or radio antennae of sorts. I figured they dropped it, so I ran outside toward where the UFO had flew away saying "Hey you forgot your transmitter!" They were gone. Shooting stars were splitting across the sky in unusual parallel and straight lines. These were crafts. The sky was filled with crafts like stars freely traveling around the planet. They were telling me to hold on to the device. I watched the sky in awe. The show of craft trails zooming around the sky in every direction felt like the promise of the comet I saw the night I zoomed in on the portal, but multiplied by ten. All that traffic, how do we miss it?

Analysis: Pretty sure gluttony was in there somewhere too. When I awoke I figured the messages were to take care of issues still holding me back from completely accepting myself and resolving karma. However, it could have also been an attempt to lure me into 'unclean' behaviors. Depends how one sees them. I still struggle with how God views physical pleasures. The fight is not against flesh and blood, but against those that control and deceive us from the spirit realm. Paraphrased from the Bible (Ephesians 6:12). That line is usually thought to have other interpretations. Are we not supposed to be fighting against our flesh and blood, our physical bodies and needs thereof, but fight against evil. Well what is evil? To deny what you psychologically, physically, or spiritually need to explore could never have been the point. Confusion, violence for unjust cause, hatred, fear, doubt and uncertainty, selfish manipulation and control without regard for others. Sex, chocolaty sweets, sensuality, styles of clothing are not products of evil, they are creations of our God still, that have been corrupted into evil things so we do not allow ourselves the freedom of joy. When these things are used in moderation and with good intent, they are not evil. They were, however, perfect things to manipulate. Target those things that bring us joy that can become most corrupt and label them indulgences that distract us from discipline and the pursuit of good, as if the path toward good is supposed to be lined with sacrificing joys, experience, passion, necessity. Yes we need discipline and self-control, but based in happiness and freedom and consideration for others. If it makes you happy, and doesn't harm others, and helps you raise your vibrations of love and joy, it can't be that bad. Depravity is bad. Denying passion and satisfaction (not at the expense of others as we assume to be the price of satisfaction) are torturous endeavors that are misrepresented. Resistance of evil in this way becomes avoidance of understanding. Just follow your joy and hold true to the desire to help others and the path becomes clear, what is truly good will be apparent. On a day when I am overwhelmed with anxiety, having a delicious treat that brings me happiness this time out of all the times I strive to watch what I consume is a perfect little cure for the moment. Things get complicated when we become dependent and do not address the causes of our symptoms and find a balance of other means to cope and eliminate the problem. All those and other sensitive areas of joy are so easily manipulated to be synonymous with addiction, abuse, misuse, complications that hurt people and oneself. I caress my child to comfort him and show my love, it is okay that I ask for this for myself from a partner.

This list should include alcohol and natural drugs which are so easily abused and called evil things. I've asked before if Angels have sex with one another. What I mean is do angels allow time for intimate contact with a loved companion? Satan represents both extremes:  conservatism and over indulgence. I believe an enlightened human would be able to incorporate all of creation into themselves with understanding and appropriate use of. Alcohol has many medical uses, and helps a person relax at the end of the day with a glass, or have a fun night out with friends (with common sense, strong moral grounding and safety measures it can be an all around enjoyable time without incident). Drugs found in natural forms obviously have been utilized pharmaceutically in tons of treatment plans. Fungus treats infection, opiates reduce pain, sedatives help sleep and relax. When used appropriately, all natural drugs can have a benefit. Lack of accurate knowledge, quick prescribing, prescription without combination of other therapies and changes to health, irresponsibility, corruption and greed all contribute to them having evil connotations.

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