Jun 28, 2013

Loving Thyself

One of my skills is being a companion and loving those I am soul-bounded to. Challenge to see myself as the higher beautiful and compassionate partner that I am, how my previous lovers from lifetimes ago saw me and continue to enjoy my company at times. The kind of pure love I've yearned to remember all this life is real somehow. With the spirit of my love we only show appreciation for who each other is and respect for what each other is doing. Our aura is merged, so we know what the other is feeling. In the physical expression process we move perfectly insync to one another's desires, that being always foremost to just be matching wavelengths to an eruption of pleasure. Pace, position, are all communicated as energy dialogue, instantaneous, without words, just a smooth exchange. Sex is a model and expression of that merging of consciousness.

Jun 26, 2013

Lost Love

No dream confirmation or response using the new content and perspective I explored yesterday about my deep water phobia. I was so sure I would have something about deep sea diving and discovery or swimming with seals. The only reason I felt it wouldn't be that is because that research for desensitizing me was earlier in the day. Before bed I was incredibly engaged in watching Project Camelot interviews with Erin "Rothschild" and the two assassins with the 4th Reich. I don't know much about the Illuminati, or the Cabal, frankly I think I've needed to establish my center before digging too deep into their history. It's shrouded in so much rumor and heresay that I preferred to do mythological research and dream investigation which would provide a clearer baseline for understanding.

Jun 25, 2013

Lego Land on Water

Summary: Correlation between my state of mind before bed and subsequent dream; lego houses and boat on lego platforms floating on sea of water; perspective shifts between in-game avatar and larger self; protection from lurking evil presence; collecting treasures and assembling a garden as a side quest, how these motivations help me resist fear; further meaning of recurring water theme and ignored lifelong fear.

Jun 24, 2013

Red Grid Marks Phenomenon - Case Study #1, Part 3 and Learning to Dream

Continued from Testimonial #1 Part 1 and Part 2

Questions remaining that may prove essential to understanding this phenomenon

Why 'Michael's back, why the butts of my palms, why the top of the hand in my Case 2 study? Does the location and shape of the marks represent something about the individual? Why a triangle, why a honeycomb, why a circle? Why are certain shapes appearing on certain people and not the same shape? Why was there pain and aching associated with mine but not with others?

Red Marks Cases - "Michael" Testimonial #1, Part 2 with Latest Theory

Summary: psychological factors; abduction dreams; similarity between us in UFO dreams; family history of abduction; trouble in bringing self and outside world to acknowledge the real effects these experiences have on the individual's sense of safety and control over their own consciousness; empowering the mind to regain control as a participant thru fair dialogue, if not purge itself of the negative source; marks as clues to our ability to manifest physical effect?

"I flared up, felt angry and resistant at this intrusion. I had the sense that the entity was showing me that nothing much had changed. Almost like they had a handle on my primal emotions or I didn't have control."
- alias 'Michael' on his attempt to reclaim control over his sleeping consciousness

The following is continuing email interview with "Michael" dated May 20, 2013:
(Continued from Part 1)

Jun 21, 2013

Entity Exchange Program Visualization

Summary: Illusion in the sky; Disclosure conference with ET guests; Call to citizens who've been studying interfacing to help; Reunion with my mentor in different form; How would we prefer disclosure?; my brainstorm of a preferred transition for public to acknowledge, accept or deny, and possibly integrate and exchange with entities from other worlds, times, and dimensions.

Jun 18, 2013

Fluctuating Star Update with Video, Part 1

Originally published 6/18/13

Finally just bothered the activities coordinator for the Science Works Museum about borrowing a telescope. He invited me to a star party later that week where local astronomers, science teachers, students, and interested star gazers come out to share their telescopes or use the museum provided ones and explore the sky.

I had a particular goal in mind, and with less than a half hour (arrived late) to figure it out in, I pestered anyone I could to show me or identify the star cycling through colors like the Berlin Star was repeatedly videotaped as. That person used an electric camcorder and auto-zoom feature that my skeptical astronomer friend from Science Works, during our private star gazing session, suggested may have caused the effect. In general the scientific astronomers there were quick to explain away why the star does this color shifting. The explanations I got were that the atmosphere is boiling and is distorting the light in that way, and that this happens on the horizon because the gases and heat rising off the Earth interfere with the penetration of light from space through our atmosphere at the horizon. True stars may twinkle more when on the horizon, but this is not twinkling and it's not the only star doing it. There were others high in that large sky I saw that night, that fluctuated like my main one. When I asked why those do it then, they said again it was atmospheric distortion, though countless ones nearby did not distort in that way of the same size.

My star is Capella, which in latin means 'to accompany'. Strange coincidence for me since my book is on imaginary companionship and my channeling experience recently revealed my lifelong imaginary friend to be an expression of the Greek god Eros. I have worked in my own private business as a counseling companion, and I personally consider myself to be polyamorous because I find joy in connection with many types of people (though I am currently in a committed relationship with a male, the father of my child). Companionship has just always been an area of exploration for me. As well, it is the root of the choral term a-cappella which is when you sing or perform without accompaniment. Choir also being a recurring theme in my dreams makes me wonder even more if there is a connection there. Am I going to Capella in my dreaming?

Capella set very early, and is one of the six brightest stars in my sky. There were also two twin stars to its right in the constellation Gemini (my sign) that also fluctuated and at a higher distance in the sky, but not as brightly.

My location for perspective was 43.716667 latitude, 10.38333 longitude, at approximately 10:30pm at night on June 8th 2013.

I peered at Capella through three or four telescopes, but still didn't have the magnification I wanted to match the electronic camcorder used to tape the Berlin star. I did manage to record digitally with a smart phone through the eye piece of one glass lens telescope though. The shaking is from me trying to hold the camera in place so the little lens is at the right angle against the eye piece of the telescope. Very tricky. Still, you can see the NATURALLY occurring fluctuations of color that are not an effect of auto zooming from an electronic camcorder, as was suggested to me as an explanation for how the Berlin guy caught such a beautiful display.

Next on the agenda is to somehow gain access to a more powerful telescope to see Capella, or perhaps another fluctuating star higher in the sky (to rule out twinkling effect of the horizon skepticism). There are a couple large telescopes in my state, but maybe too powerful. I don't even know what magnification I need.

Before, I was asking myself "If this is an amazing thing, how is it possible no one else has noticed?" The answer is that astronomers have automatically dismissed this fluctuation as a natural phenomenon. Perhaps even it is that portals between stars are naturally occurring, but no one has yet considered that it might be something other than a trick of light bending in the atmosphere (a hypothesis which doesn't add up because certain stars are doing this behavior, including ones at all different degrees around the sky, with no apparent relationship between the effect and size or type of star (since Antares, a red giant also seems to do this fluctuation).

The wild hypothesis, if what the electronic camera's are showing is an accurate representation of these stars, is they are travel links to those stars, so the wormhole is in direct line of sight of the star. 

Remote Viewing Reptilians

During the star party, I briefly interviewed an amateur astronomer by the name Zander, also in attendance at the star party who described to me a vivid dream that has stuck out at him. He saw 7-8 ft tall greenish Reptilian beings looking at computer hardware in an underground cavern. They noticed he was watching them and moved toward him. He decided against engaging with them in anyway. He felt discomfort about their intentions toward him, not necessarily that they would hurt him, but he didn't care to find out.

Power of Imagination, and The Ultimate Unknown

Summary: Week's worth of dreams -  
Water/snow theme needing more investigation even after channeling discovery of it representing "same gene pool"; dark force mist invading my town and a test in the creative power of belief and imagination; thrift store theme, now toy store and a lead toward next Level up in spiritual abilities; stretching space and thick area effect like a black hole (portal?). 

Jun 11, 2013

Facing the Fear of Rejection

Series of recreations with people from my life. These were not memories, and actually now that I think about it, my dreams are rarely ever replaying memories, they are usually recreations and slight alterations added. Otherwise, my dreams are purely new stories using some elements of my life experiences, sometimes not.

Jun 9, 2013

Accepting My Skills and Favors

Summary: Standing out in new choir; New hire at primate facility; Motherly to a chimp toddler; Ethical dilemma on caging animals leads to a recognizably self-generated scene of helping release a pregnant gorilla; Distinction made between dream content and sequence assembled by outside design and those imaginings of my creation; Acknowledging the degree of my skills and allowing for the gifts granted to me by my hard work; Gift from my distant sister and the guilt of receiving rewards being viewed as freebees or good luck by my struggling family.

Jun 7, 2013

Level Up! : The Experience of Channeling Contact

I did it! I had my first waking channeling. I've been trying to research the process and how it feels, all the little details people who don't know how to want to know and met resistance from one source I tried to draw it from, and haven't been hearing back from the other (both are human channels who do it for a living). Weeks and weeks I've been waiting and wondering if I could do it and what the presences I keep calling are trying to say but I can't seem to establish the link.

Jun 3, 2013

Red, red, red

I have been depicted as 'the girl in red' in recent dreams. Well, the following is a dream from last December with a woman in red and red-skinned beings. 

Night of Dec. 7/8th 2012

Wandering about a junkyard. There are buried tables under sand that are still useable and look new. Furniture on display. I am outside but darkness around the area until treeline, and sky is at sunset. No overgrowth, just sand and dirt and flatness. Link is playing on a toddler push car. I call out re-directions once a while to him. (Second-hand furniture lot? Makeshift goods lot after a disaster?).

I lose track of him, my son, while looking around at items. Panic. Searching, calling for him. I erupt into an opening where I can see the sky. Link is unconscious AND (somehow) awed at the sight in the sky. I gather him up. A human shape and a cow in a light beam are suspended high in the air above the trees. 'An alien abduction! I'm witnessing one!' I think to myself. Two hand lengths to the right in the sky is another figure from the torso up waving at me. I say aloud "It's waving at me!"

My perception zooms toward the being and now I am on a ship with him. I immediately voice my first concern "Did you do something to my son?" I ask accusingly. It pauses and simply shakes its head. "Oh." I said, knowing it was being truthful. My mistrust was on display. I quickly changed my attention to the fact I was on a ship with this human-like creature. They were tall in simple robed dress. Large heads. Same facial features and appearance as humans, but head where brain juts out is double the size, close to the elongated craniums from archaeological records, but not quite as long. No hair, skin tone is reddish in color, and more veins visible subdermally (not bulging). Skin looks the color of a flushed caucasian, but all over and natural state. These are either our ancestors/galactic roots, or future humans. They look like what an older human might look like if we didn't age, whither and die, but kept growing. Taller, bigger brain, more veins, still smooth texture. Everything else physically the same.

I am seated by an older woman who is wrinkly. She says "You don't remember me do you? I am Jen, the woman you saw at the party collapse. I had to come back here." "But you were younger, a beautiful blonde in a red dress (which she still was, just older now suddenly)?" I was stunned and excited seeing these pieces of research and rumor come together in this vision. At some point I had been in a different time line seeing through her eyes, trying to effect some change at a party before collapsing to the floor and people all around me/her. Funny that her name is a variation of mine.

More individuals were coming aboard. The Elders (as I have called the red-skinned talls) were organized, silent mostly, telepathic perhaps, coordinating so many people and things. I respected their calm, yet deliberate actions.

I sat near a door to a small room at one wall of the craft on a bench with a human male. We discussed what the rooms might be, agreeing on time traveling units. An elder opened the curtain in front of us to let a little blonde girl sit by us and told us to explain to her what's going on. The girl stared at me expressionless, innocent white face with doll like short blondish hair. I know her. I've seen her before. How do I know her? "Shouldn't we explain what's going on?" I asked my chatty male companion. She was the same girl I talked to in another dream, the only one who received my message when I veiled myself. Why is she significant to my dreaming? Who is she? My unknown daughter? She's maybe 8 years old.

He explains briefly to her about time machines and the Elders as best as we know. I say it's going to be okay, that others went in and came out better than before so it must be safe.

We each went into one of our own rooms. Doors closed. Room began to shake violently. Put my head between my knees. There was a time paradox here. I went and did other things but know I came back, like a dream within a dream, just not sure if this was perceived immediately or after the events.

Our doors opened and we were all covered in gold dust sparkling on their heads and shoulders like it fell on us like rain, and we all shared the feelings of awe and joy. There were many of us I could see through the walls of our rooms like the walls and ceiling of the ship became transparent and looked out into space. Were we linked to one another now? Were our abilities awakened? Were we returning in unison from a time travel episode?

Next, or preceding scene, I am in a car on a grassy hill with Jim (my spouse/partner) overlooking Erin and Michelle (old friends I fell out of) entering onto a field and into a transparent gateway or cloaked ship with their kids and spouses (they have kids and spouses?). I wanted to say helo but couldn't decide to bring Jim or not. Didn't feel it fair to exclude him, but figured they'd respond better if he weren't joining me. Should I bring Link or leave him with Jim too? I couldn't decide and thus couldn't seem to will myself to get out of the care before they disappeared into the field.

I ran after them only to find some of their abandoned stuff in a room (not sure spatially where I am). I am fixated on Michelle's stuff, a few books and diary on a white desk. White everywhere. Transparent walls with cloudiness, like the light is emanating from the wall material itself, but brightest around edges. One book in particular has a cover that shows images of the classic devil icon (red skin, horns). The title is referring to how the concept of the devil has been connected to all things fun and misrepresented as sinful, like in sex jokes; how the devil has become a symbol of humorous fun at the expense of moral seriousness. Lies perpetuated by false ideas of good and evil.

My understanding is good is all about happiness, passion, enjoyment, paired with other attributes of graciousness, consideration of others. The book was written with a comedic tone by the author whom the dream was branding a son of Satan. I wanted to open and read a bit of it because at this time I was struggling with how religious perception of good and evil may be corrupted. Everything available to us like sex and alcohol are neutral, how we misuse them is what determines their connotation, and how we restrict others to partake of them when it clashes with the personal exploratory desire to. I've wondered because Lucifer was supposedly a beautiful being, how the ugly, scary image came to be associated to him, and could that have been a deliberate manipulation to instill fear in us for this kind of creature. I was being held back from reading it thoroughly, though I wanted to. I have seen this book in my dreams before. It was important enough to repeat.

Next, or preceding scene, I am with a band of three other military type individuals as a unit on a battlefield. Two warring factions of large, animal shaped animated machines are closing fast on our position [I dislike war, why do I keep seeing myself involved in it]. Think mech techs from video gaming that resemble different animals but animated with souls. Their eyes and mouths glowed with anger and consciousness.

My unit was trying to disable them by hacking into two fallen animal mechs, one from each opposing side. They were a threat toward us humans too, some spotted us and charged us so they could have the satisfaction of fighting their war. Such bitterness and hate. Side of mammals had been wronged by the other side of dragon-like. My unit's mission was to stop the fighting, regardless who was right or who wanted revenge. Humanity was endangered by their bitter war.

I could coordinate my group's activities based on their skills from a holographic interface that appears over my vision like a video game menu, but it does not pause the action when I bring it up, so I must make choices quickly. I hoped to catch my breath by bringing it up, overwhelmed with anxiety about the situation.

We rigged one fallen mech. As were heading to the other, the charging fleet of mechs on one side steered toward us to intercept. We were surrounded. We posed a greater threat to them than each other did. Both sides diverted their attack to keep us from deanimating them.

Today, June 3rd 2013

My sister has recently divulged to me how she has always visualized the imaginary being I call Darian when we were young. She saw him with a red aura. This struck me as crazily coincidental. My image of him derived from the place I got his name: that show Sailor Moon we loved as kids. How is it she saw such a drastically different being, though I shared my own description on many occasions. She said whenever I talked about him, she saw a red colored being that loved me with a father's love. I asked her to describe him more in detail:

-almost reptilian in that head has layer of scales upon scales, maybe more like a Klingon's ridges from Star Trek
-bat-like ears
-tribal markings
-pale red or dark red aura or skin tone depending on my mood
-protrusions like extended bones at shoulders, elbows, and head.

"Katie" I said "Do you mean to tell me you saw the Devil following me?"

"Well I wasn't sure how you would react to what I envisioned, but really I was upset for you how the image of the your Darian as that creature was misrepresented by people to be evil."

"But why red?" The color only has evil connotations in the religious community, though blood is red.

"What else is red?" She replied. She used to despise the color too because it was too bright and bold. It says alert, stand out, notice this, though she preferred the comfort of hiding, since she is a shy and unsure soul. In her research though, she found from Chinese myth that red warded off evil entities when children would be taken away, they wore red to protect themselves. Dragons became red in New Year celebrations because of its symbolic nature as protection from evil. Egyptians had a red stone accepted by people who were dying to indicate a calm readiness of their approaching death. It showed humble yielding to the cycle of life and death.

I had always wondered why I never saw Darian in my dreams, though the name Darian was just what I gave him, the imaginary presence of a loving, mysterious companion I could call on whenever I needed for whatever I needed. Even now, I hesitate about the symbolism. The human form I gave him was never quite right. I usually assigned him as a hybrid of three forms: part human, part dragon, part vampire. Very girlish, I didn't think much of it. But reptiles and dragons are in my dreams, vampires are in my dreams, even a three-form demon joined my party at one point with a human form, pale blue form with the same protrusions as my sister's description, and a red one I couldn't picture. The blue one felt more threatening than the other two though. Odd that the blue color would be the threatening one. My mind wanders on about how complexly I may have been manipulated, because I am more inclined to connect and trust a being of this type than I am a beautiful angelic form. At least the beast isn't trying to be deceptive by showing himself though others will fear and threaten him this way.

Why does it have to be a devil form? I couldn't open the book because I wasn't prepared (and still am nervous to) for the truth of my guide? His race may have been targeted to appear Yet I would more easily embrace him this way, than Jesus in his etheral body, as blasphemous as it is to say that. Perhaps even its clever reverse, reverse psychology. Frankly I don't know and I won't commit either way still, but Darian looking like a devil is not far from how he usually is represented in my role play exercises, at least as a dragon who is feared and hides in human form to not hurt humans by forcing them to confront something they will jump to preconceived notions and inherent fears about.

Neutrality. I am meant to protect, but not in war, not by hate-bashing another side, despite how corrupt or evil they are. Love is not a war, peace is not a war, unity is not war. Perhaps now I am ready to finally see the true forms of my guides?

Quantum Locking

Notes from TED Talk demonstration video by Boaz Almog, and from his site www.quantumlevitation.com:

The Physics:
Quantum locking/levitation with superconductors
Magnetic force actually appears as particle streams and behaves like particles
There is zero electrical resistence (electricity is the flow of electrons thru a material)
In superconductivity, there is no energy loss from collisions because magnetic fields are expelled by circulating currents around the object and trapping those inside (locks the fluxon strands in place)

Superconductor freely rotates on a circular magnet! UFO's are commonly seen and taped rotating while hovering like a spinning top on an axial tilt (not unlike the Earth).

Object used in this demonstration is a thin wafer of sapphire coated in a ceramic compound of Yttrium (superconducting element), Barium, Copper, and Oxygen (YBCO), and wrapped in plastic. The mist is liquid nitrogen used to keep the temperature of the object below -185 degrees C (-301 degrees F). Superconductor remains on track at same speed and position (as though in zero point field similar to outer space) as long as temperature is below that mark.

Superconductors can store energy, and levitate objects 70,000x its own weight in this way (transfer current). 

Locking occurs because magnetic field DOES penetrate thru the thin superconductor.

Still interacts to gravity though, as demonstrated by the it riding a dipped bridge track back and forth (video on site). Height of levitation depends in part how cold the temp of the object is, that is, how long has it been left to cool in the liquid nitrogen.

The mist seen at UFO sightings may be the same kind of temperature regulation.

Guy who made rock garden with impossible to move stones by himself and claimed to have discovered how the pyramids were built kept his secret in a little black box that disappeared after his death. Box could not have had liquid nitrogen in it. So how else is this happening in our atmosphere?

Other superconductors only work at extremely high temperatures. May be why so many were/are spotted in the desert. YBCO superconductor above critical temp 93 degrees Kelvin as well.

Does making zero point craft fly freely in our atmosphere at least have to do with the Earth's geomagnetic field?

UFO's often seen coming out of and going into the ocean. Magnetic fields affect the rate of flow in salt water. A strong magnet will actually bend a stream of falling tap water. (See video at this site)
If humans are made of more than 70% water, what effect would wrapping the body in a strong magnetic field have? What was shown to me was smothering the naked body in a thick mud of phosphate (salt of phosphoric acid); salt and water, which would essentially create a magnetic field in and around the body. But how strong, and what mixture of parts per I do not know.

Inter-temporal, Superluminal Vehicles

Date unknown, retrieved from Dream Tracking journal

In a laboratory, walking around like on a tour. There are scientists in white overcoats busying about, and large computers with colored lights and cords, technologies I don't recognize. The room is filled with a natural white light so commonly seen in my dreams that emanates from the walls themselves, or the windows were clouded enough to shield view of the outside and outside in, but transparent enough to let in light. Windows would have covered the front walls in two rows of large panels each panel 8' x 8' ft. Very clean room. Experimental projects room. A ladder leads up to a balcony that traces all along the opposite wall to the 'windows' that is lined with a railing. More of an observation deck to oversee the project hanging above ground on a large suspension from the ceiling in an extended area of the room.

Jun 2, 2013

Communication Device Sketches

Summary: Drawings of communications devices from dreams; theory on realities occupying same space-time as ours with visuals.

Figure 1. Communication Devices Sketches, Page 1

The Girl in Red

An unfortunate turn of events happened with a source for my book, which has greatly upset me. I sobbed over the issue continuously. Writing a non-fiction is difficult, and painful to deal with when people I thought I could trust or have come to rely upon are so afraid of an idea, exposure, or attention that they ... Very sternly, two of my sources, one being my own sister, denied permission to include the stories about them in the book, neither of which were negative in representing them. If I am to attain approval from every source I use, this book will never be published. Really, though, this is what a publisher and editor is for. I should not concern myself with permissions just yet. I need to just get it done. Still, the source I lost connected me to a greater spiritual community whom I cannot help but feel outcast from now. My search for spiritual belonging stumbles yet again.