Feb 2, 2013

Faith, Trust, and Love

Night of Feb 1st/2nd 2013

In prelude, I asked whilst in meditative thought before bed, prompted by a recent message through medium and writer Elizabeth Trutwin (see http://garuda.co for links to her other sites as well) if what those in the Galactic Federation belief system (I call it thus simply for those who do not know of it yet and I do not for certain of its existence, although my personal evidences so far suggest it does) call Twin Flames are responsible for helping guide us in dreams. Is my TF the experiences I am perceiving in my dreams, the other half of myself that is placed in particular experiences on the ships to supplement my physical existence? Dreams are very often determined by what we are struggling with, they can answer pure thought questions when it will benefit our ascension and return to a complete merging to true selves with our TFs. Theories I've had in the past weren't supported, such as: is the consciousness transferred to a clone body somewhere else where it is programmed for specific tasks; which started with the wonder if our bodies are literally abducted and programmed, then returned. Drugs and manipulation would have to be involved. But there was never even a trace memory of being physically taken, and my family never noticed my absence. I could jolt back to my body sometimes. There just wasn't any evidence or feeling of truth to this hypothesis. It had to have a more esoteric component. Then it was deciphering whether humans are being used at this time when they are most vulnerable, or if the imposition of dreams had a more benevolent agenda. I increasingly suspect that ideas we would call inspiration are implanted or observed through our TFs, especially if we prompt them to scope out an answer by devoting intense thought to a problem we want solved. Consider how often mathematicians, scientists, artists, writers, sculptors, inventors, philosophers throughout time discovered their answer in a dream after rigorous contemplation during their waking state.

What does this all mean? That truth is not as far away as we expect. We need only calm our minds and wait for an answer that will honestly appear in our consciousness'. I analyze questions and problems to death, knowing that I need only close my eyes and let the truth come in. But out of mistrust of my own filters, I must sift through all those "knowings" anyway. In time, if the 'truth' that came to me holds up, if it increasingly feels right, then I learn to trust it to be truth. With concepts like dreaming, and the existence of influential telepathic beings of energy that communicate with us constantly and can see and hear us constantly -  invisible things difficult to prove - it partially comes down to faith. Faith is always what it keeps coming back to. That thing we struggle with that is a choice and holds the key to our freedom.

I have been researching and writing a book on imagination. As I've been doing this dream tracking and exploration, I realized just how intimately intertwined faith and imagination is. By imagining that which we want and need and working to bring those imaginings into the physical world, we thus prove for ourselves that we have control in shaping our world. Confidence, self-esteem, faith can all be summoned and learned and you can control how they manifest for you. We each have unique sets of problems and issues absorbed into us by this physical world and the illusion that things happen to us without acknowledgment of how we are allowing it to affect us that makes its effect. When we realize everything perceived as negative is ultimately an incomplete picture because duality is the separation of things that should be unified, then we begin to change the filters by which we let things shape us. If we resonate of love, trust, and faith, then we are impenetrable.

Dream: Ascending rows (4-6; very long) of seats like a stadium along the shore of a lake. A hundred students, myself included, sitting among them talking and facing the lake. Two by two, in sequence, we take our turns treading around in a general area of the water. Sun is setting. I feel increasingly anxious not about treading in the water or about being observed, but because I anticipate the water to be cold by the time its my turn. I am still affected by the rules of time and predictability of the illusion in this physical world. In the dream I could have trusted the water to be warm, that I would not be made to take my turn in pain. I thought "Hurry up hurry up, I want to get my turn in before the sun goes down." Based on how my other dreams have worked, all I needed to do was think the water to be warm and then I would be pleased, if not surprised, that it is when I get into it. Instead, the selection order hopped around me, purposefully delaying my turn. The sun tipped down over the horizon. The sequence was continuing. They were trying to tell me that my anxiety would be pointless if I just conveyed in faith what I needed.

As to why we were tasked to take turns in pairs swimming in the same area of the water, I had the sense we were keeping something open, perhaps an underwater portal. Are portals made out of thought energy? I've wondered this before because such a beautiful flux of colors seemed only possible as a creation of the purest of imagining. I'm sure there is a technological component as well, but what if the energy to ignite it is pure thought energy? There are ancient star gates all around the world on the surface made of stone. Do these still work? The crop circle phenomenon emphasizes the sacredness of geometry, especially the circle. Precise geometric shapes created in natural stone, what a beautiful representation of what I would call natural technology designed in cooperation with the Earth and natural intelligent laws. Pyramids, star gates, obelisks. These are the base technologies of the Galactics for communication, transportation or amplification to and with the higher dimensional beings of our Watchers/Galactic Relatives. Could be as simple as a raised hill or mountain to amplify the signal of your thoughts. Better the view, higher the price of real estate. Another control mechanism of the masses.

Next sequence: In a classroom, atmosphere is tinted a pale blue, like a projector's light is the only source of light in the room. Wide lecture hall style to sit a hundred students. Not full. Maybe twenty or thirty of us scattered around, mainly down the center aisle. I start in back and find my way up front later on after an activity. A couple students are leading with the help of a couple others to help illustrate the lesson. She is demonstrating why people cheat and veer away from their partners. It was a meaningful, silent, way of convincing the class of the weakness of these people who stray. She had a very simplistic view on the issue but was conveying it with such power by using this demonstration that it would convince anyone that her approach is the truth. I interrupt, knowing her approach is convincing but fails to address the complexities of the issue and feel compassion for the other persons involved. "This is an incomplete view on this matter. People who stray aren't always just going selfishly for someone younger, acting on their physical impulse to be with a young beauty (she was focusing on males, so I tried to vouch for the males). Yes maybe some do (I emphasized there are some that do, but that there is a more important reason not being addressed), but most people veer because the relationship they are in is dysfunctional, they are not connecting with their partner, and in many cases never did truly have an intimacy with their partner. So the drift away from feeling they know and connect with their partner only compounded. They rarely have intention to hurt their partner, usually they do their affairs in secret because they don't want to hurt their partner, but the truth of the matter is that they are both miserable and keeping themselves chained to relationship that does not benefit either person. In the minds of those who instinctively search elsewhere for a better candidate, they have already begun to let go of the stagnation with their current partner. Emotionally they were always detached, regardless what they were declared as in social or legal ways."
Someone in back asked I would know this.
"I am writing a book on imaginary companionship where I have been analyzing what drives our behaviors in relationships of all kinds. The very inclination to be searching for a replacement, someone you can be fulfilled with divulges the truth that there are needs not being met both ways that, in many cases, have been repressed."
I felt like an authority on the subject. My explanation was of course just the tip of the iceberg of the full picture, but it was a start in bringing up how oversimplified and judgmental the leading student's message was.

Next sequence: Elevator in a tall building of apartments. Clean and beautiful. Meet a lady whom I walk to her place. She invites me in. I find she actually has like six children and am amazed at how composed she is. It a large family, with an uncle ... [My dream memories are mixing up with images I've seen in real life on television or music or online media. Trouble sometimes to decipher whether an image was something I saw in a dream or in media.] They were very busy. I explained to an adult male (the dad?) that we met coming up the elevator and I sort of invited myself in to meet everyone. I mentioned I have a son and am shocked they decided to have so many children. She was certainly a busy personality, but was filled with love and tolerance.

I realized they lived right next to my apartment and invited them over whenever they wanted to return the favor for letting me meet their family. I walk through a side door connecting their apartment to mine, like a hotel might have joining rooms. I shed my coat and scarf, keys and purse and called for Jim. There is two burgers on a pan on the stove steaming. My first impression is that he left these cooking. He called to me assuring me he knows they're there and that he was making one for me. I felt embarrassed I had doubted him. He comes into the living room and sits. He wants to watch the Superbowl. I was going to tell him what happened with the lady I met that lives next door with her many kids.

I think I get it. Faith, trust, love for Jim, those closest to me who are always there for me, as much as I am inclined to feel for general people and invisible divinities. I will have a great opportunity to do this when I go live with my parents for a month to work on my book.

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