May 13, 2015





Faces

Four times now I have had experiences where I see a face during an OBE. The first was back in early 2013. My dream/OBE journal says:
I try to open my eyes and it seems as if I’ve opened my eyes and I see a faint face, possibly one that looks like me (I realize after that I wasn’t really opening my eyes). I can’t move. I summon all my psychic energy towards anger and the experience fades away and I’m back to normal. In a possible dream state I think to myself that maybe this is a memory I’m experiencing.

 
The first thing to note is my confusion and equivocations about the experience when I tried to write it down. When I wrote, "I try to open my eyes", I am expressing the oddness of being separated from my body and the sense of still trying to operate my body in the normal way. It's easy to forget that one is in a realm that can be described as "imaginal" (not imaginary) and the normal rules are dissolved. Being able to "see" astrally has been one of my greatest challenges and I've only had limited success. It has been something that has happened to me more than I've been able to consciously initiate. In retrospect and after reading accounts from other experiencers I think this face may have been my own.
The 2nd event on the night of March 28th/29th 2014 was also confusing. Here is part of my journal entry.
I hear random noises. I’m partially asleep and I decide to try an OBE. I focus hard and its like I fall into a deeper, more relaxed state and hear a rushing noise and move up, or feel I do. It’s confusing because I can’t see much of anything. I get pulled back to my body because of some noise...At some point I’m interfered with by the raping being. Or did I summon him? I don’t know. I strain to see him and I see a small rectangular opening with a mouth. Are there vampire-like teeth? I do a battle of wills with the being--I feel like fighting and I’m not quite as afraid. Or it feels like that anyway. At some point I slip into a dream state or what seems like one and I tell the being that he can continue to visit if he works it out so that I come across more money in life. I’m not sure where that idea came from, perhaps it was a desperate wish.
Jennifer has already discussed this experience in a previous post but I want to point out that though the experience was confusing, I was still somewhat consciously engaged and trying to work with the situation. Even if it's terrifying, I want to see.
More recently in October of 2014 I had another odd event. Again from my journal:
I enter obe state. It’s interesting how much easier I enter it from feeling only partly asleep. I feel myself rising and ask for spiritual assistance in my endeavor. Eventually the evil presence shows up and I thrust my hands out to stop it. I’m successful but then later on I think it gets me and rapes me. I try to see and "shout" to be able to see [something I read OBE expert William Buhlman suggest]. I ask for wisdom about [name omitted] and I think my love life. Eventually I see in the blackness two smokey faces coming together and kissing. An omen?
After having this experience I realized even further that I was taking more and more conscious control during the event. Even though the "evil" familiar paid yet another visit I was still trying to use the experience to gain more wisdom and direction in life. "It" was less of a centerpiece of the experience. 
 Here is another:

Take some tryptophan and drift off. I had some inclination towards an OBE but not much. I find myself levitated pretty strongly but probably not voluntarily. I have an inclination to pray or ask for help or something but nothing really comes out right. I feel a little bit raped but also like I'm being protected. I try to see what is hurting me and a face fades into view. It looks human (a little like me?) but also alien.
I was a little scared during this event, hence my not being left with a clear picture of the face. In retrospect I'm thinking this face may have been reptilian in nature.

Over the past year, as I have grown emotionally and spiritually and, oddly enough, become more grounded in my "first body", the physical body, my experiences have become much less traumatic and I've shown more ability to bring to bear my psychic defenses. You can read about that most recent experience here.
 

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